J s

Hari ini kembali menetes air mataku untukmu. Hari ini teringat kembali semua memory yang kau katakan, saat kita bersama. Aku sendiri tak habis pikir kenapa susah sekali untuk menghilangkan dirimu. Semakin aku beranjak untuk melupakan mu, semakin sesak rasanya.
Kembali otakku memutar saat kau mengatakan padaku untuk melupakan mu. Dan saat itulah aku kembali menghitung berapa kali mataku meneteskan air mata dan berapa kali hatiku tersayat karena mu.
Inginnya hari ini aku meluapkan segalanya padamu, bercerita bebas tentang hari ini dan apa yang ku alami saat kau mulai pergi dariku.


Hari ini kembali ku melihat canda tawa mu, kedekataan mu dengan nya. Tak bisa kupungkiri bahwa aku masih merasa tersakiti karena aku masih menyayangi mu. Otakku bahkan masih memutar semua memori yang pernah terjadi.

Masih teringat rasa aman, rasa hangat nya pelukan mu saat ku ketakutan. Masih terasa nyaman belaian tangan mu di rambutku. Masih terasa terasa sikap acuh mu padaku. Dan masih sangat terasa pula bahkan masih terdengar perkataan mu yang meminta ku menjauh darimu.

Bisakah kau setidaknya menghiburku untuk hari ini saja??











for : Mr.Judes

Something More - Secondhand Serenade

I lie awake again, my bodies feeling paralysed
I can’t remember when
I didn’t live through this disguise
The words you said to me
They couldn’t set me free

Im stuck here in this life i didn’t ask for
There must be something more,
Do we know what we’re fighting for?

Breathe in breathe out
Breathe in breathe out

And all these masks we wore
We never knew what we had in store

Breathe in breathe out
Breathe in breathe out

The storm is rolling in
The thunders loud it hurts my ears

Im paying for my sins
And its gunna rain for years and years

I fooled everyone and now what will i become?
I have to start this over
I have to start this over

There must be something more,
Do we know what we’re fighting for?

Breathe in breathe out
Breathe in breathe out

And all these masks we wore
We never knew what we had in store

Breathe in breathe out
Breathe in breathe out

I fooled everyone and now what will i become?
I have to start this over
I have to start this over

There must be something more,
Do we know what we’re fighting for?

Breathe in breathe out
Breathe in breathe out

And all these masks we wore
We never knew what we had in store

Breathe in breathe out
Breathe in breathe out

There must be something more
Breathe in breathe out
There must be something more

Kok Ngerasa ada yang Aneh

Hari ini aku ngerasa bener bener ada yang aneh sama aku pribadi. Entah ada apa, aku sendiri juga g tau, atau memang hanya perasaan ku aja.
Hal pertama yang membuat ku aneh hari ini, aku ngerasa kayak kedua best ku takut sama aku.
Hal kedua, salah satu best ku si Tatta kayak beda gitu setelah sama si pacar barunya Naray. Padahal sebelum nya aku juga ngerasa biasa, apa aku nya aja kalik ya.
Hal ketiga, emang sih biasanya kalau pas berangkat sekolah kalau pas adiknya si Della g sekolah motornya dipakek sama aku dan si Della. Pas aku nyampe rumah, ya kan emang si Della pulang duluan tanpa ngomong ke aku minta kuncinya itu. Nah sampek dirumah kayak aku ngerasa di jutek in sama mama nya si Della.
Hal keempat, g biasanya aku suka ngembek ke best ku Citra cuma gara gara dia g mau ikut padsu.
Hal kelima, ngomongin soal perasaan pokoknya ada yang ngganjel aja gitu.
Hal keenam, kayak tadi siang di sekolah itu omongan ku g dianggep semua sama temen temenku, kayak dicuekin. Padahal g biasanya gitu

Tapi tadi pas aku iseng iseng buka TL nya twitter ku, aku ngeliat tweet nya si Citra juga bilang, ada yang aneh g kayak biasanya. Wah... ada apa ya??
Tadi aku juga sempet curhat sama best ku si Della katanya sih itu cuma PMS, ya emang sih bentar lagi waktunya aku mens. Tapi ya aneh aja gitu hari ini...

Berharap itu cuma bawaan PMS aja lah. Huffttt!!! Kalau lagi sumpek gini jadi keinget rumah trus curhat sama mama.
Haaahhhhh kapan ada liburan lagi ya. Mungkin karena bawaan suasana juga kali ya.
Pengen tenang sejenak.

Thinking Of You

Comparisons are easily done
Once you've had a taste of perfection
Like an apple hanging from a tree
I picked the ripest one
I still got the seed

You said move on
Where do I go
I guess second best
Is all I will know

Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into your eyes

You're like an Indian summer
In the middle of winter
Like a hard candy
With a surprise center
How do I get better
Once I've had the best
You said there's
Tons of fish in the water
So the waters I will test

He kissed my lips
I taste your mouth
He pulled me in
I was disgusted with myself

Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into...

You're the best
And yes I do regret
How I could let myself
Let you go
Now the lesson's learned
I touched it I was burned
Oh I think you should know

Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into your eyes
Looking into your eyes
Looking into your eyes
Oh won't you walk through
And bust in the door
And take me away
Oh no more mistakes
Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay...

03 MEI 2012

Lama nih g ngentry ngentry blog lagi. Hari ini aku bakalan ngentry apa ya?? Sebenernya g jelas sih. Tapi emang aku cuma bisa nulis aja.


Hari ini bener bener hari tersial buat aku, apa gara gara aku kejatuhan cicak kemarin malam ya. Hahaha cuma mitos itu


Gue cuma bisa ketawa aja mengingat hal tadi. Actually i was forgeting my feel to you. but this day you help me to remember again, and your way make me hurt. How can you just be a calm person when someone who loves you got hurt because of you? I still remember what you said to me. Can you just thinking about my affect to you?? Can you just said thank you to me, and appreciate what i've done to you. 


You said if what you've done with me is a WRONG decision. Sebenernya aku masih bingung kenapa elu tiba tiba ngomong kayak gitu sama gue. Do you think, if i am not sincere do your job??!! Apakah kamu pikir aku punya maksud tersembunyi?!


Do you ever feel what i feel ?! Pernahkah aku berkata : "kok gitu?" atau "jangan!". I just can say : "no problem"
Yes you right, if your concern is done here, but why about me? Do you ever think about that? Do you know I cry because of you?! Apakah kamu MALU jika aku menyayangimu?!  You only think about yourself, your friends. YOU NEVER THINK ABOUT ME!!!!! Yes i'm right, 100% it's true. In fact you just can say nothing and confused when my bestfriend come to you and get angry to you. 


I'm sorry if i said that, but i'm not sure if you sincere when you apologize to me. 
Stiil remember in my brain what you said. YOU SAID THAT I'M THE REASON WHY SOMEONE THAT YOU LIKE GO AWAY FROM YOU. Setelah kamu berkata itu, di pikiran ku hanya satu : YOU LIE TO ME
kamu berkata g sesuai dengan fakta. Is that your way to make me angry an go away from you? You wrong again, what you've done is only make me remember you again. How stupid you are!! :'( 


That's hurt!!!! Yes, i'm more stupid then you, yes you right. But remember that, i begin to love you, when you have broke up with my bestfriend. I still remember that you said if you will keep my feeling like her feeling, but in fact??!!!! YOU JUST KEEP HER FEELING!!! and i just can say : "no problem" (AGAIN). I ever say to you if i never want you to love me back! i just want you to treated me same as her. you said, yes i will. but in fact?? YOU NEVER DO IT, and i just can say : "no problem" (AGAIN). 


And now i'm sure that 100% you call me a stranger. You hate me. You say i always bother you. Can you see what are you doing to me?? Can you see it, even if it just for a while?
Although you hate me with all your heart, honestly i never hate you.
I just want to be your friends again like them. Can you just do it to me??! Bersikap biasa padaku seolah olah tak pernah ada apa apa diantara kita??!!

Do you know, if your silent is already make me sad enough. You hate when i'm looking for information about you. Are you stupid??!! If girl like a boy, she will do that. It same as with you. Do you remember when you looking for information about my bestfriend, YOU ASK ME!! Masih dapatkah kamu diam tanpa mengerti bagaimana rasanya saat berada diposisi ku.

Yes you right, i love you. But is it wrong?? Do you remember when you like mybestfriend? KAMU  BERKATA : "YA AKU G TAU, DATANGNYA TIBA TIBA KOK."

Yes you don't say to me, but i know all about what you said, and how your expression from my bestfriend who got angry with you. You said, you dont have any friends to hear your vent. I think that's IMPOSSIBLE!! You have more friends than me. I know that all your friends have good equality. Why you dont just tell them what you feel, before you made a wrong decision. 

I just want to say, CONGRATULATION WITH YOUR ACCESION. I HOPE YOU HAPPY WITH YOUR WRONG DECISION. 

i'm here, and i regret why you came to me when i was forgeting you, and you bring all my memory about you AGAIN.